All that aside, I’m here now and I’m pissed. Why? You might well ask that if you, a living human being, were actually reading this instead of being used as a mere device to accommodate my unwieldy prose. As I am reasonably confident you do not exist and are not asking anything at all, I will continue on ahead without regard to any of your subsequent “questions,” adorably ignorant though they be.
The reason my imaginary audience finds me so peevish today is due primarily to political developments. The Republican primary is, as they say in France, totally cocked up. The latest polls show Mitt Romney has a chance of winning Iowa – weird enough alone. But Ron Paul is also forecast to make a strong showing. As a final slap in the face to my good humor, Rick Santorum (a perfectly decent man with troubling Big Government leanings) is now “surging” to a heretofore unimaginable 16%. Oh, whatever.
If one envisions the Iowa electorate as a slutty cheerleader, and I do, then Rick Santorum is the next to last football player in line to be…no, let’s abandon that one. Undignified.
The fickle conservative base has utterly failed at this point to coalesce behind a viable alternative to Mitt Romney, which is nobody’s fault but our own. My feelings on Rick Perry are known, and I maintain his record on jobs and governing Texas far outweighs poor debate performances and gaffes. As each Conservative Tiger Beat Fantasy Candidate had a turn being idolized, scrutinized, and then tossed aside, Mitt Romney sat back and waited. He yet abides, though of course nothing is certain.
But that’s not even what has me spun up lately. It’s the Ron Paul thing. Has there ever been a clearer indication that the denizens of the fever swamp have ventured out of their domain of veiled anti-Semitism, clandestine-to-overt racism, neo-isolationist America Firsterism, and paranoia to walk in the sunlight with good Conservative folk? How did we let this happen?
When Buckley drove the Birchers into their holes, did we not post sentries against their inevitable return? Did these thought-goblins change shape, somehow? Glamour us with soothing harsh criticism of the Obama administration? Did we allow our focus on the rotten economy to blind us to the fact that somehow the creeps were creeping back in to the party of Conservatism?
Let’s face it very plainly – Ron Paul and his followers are not truly conservatives. There are several points of contrast, between Conservatives on the one hand and Ron Paul and his Libertarian Cult of Personality on the other. As you are doubtless growing bored with this post, I shall not attempt to list them but a casual reading of existing literature may elucidate matters.
Conservatives acknowledge political reality, foremost among those realities that America has Enemies. Ron Paul seems to believe if we do not meddle with people like the Iranians, they will leave us alone, and their regional power grasping won’t affect our interest. Ron Paul is not a Conservative. Ron Paul is an old fool.
We Conservatives are the more foolish for not being sufficiently aware of who we are to formally and finally excise the stunted little wart.
Today’s rant partially inspired by this article from Matt Lewis.