With Apologies to Wilfred Owen

Please, somebody.

Bent double, we new beggars under tax,
Knock-kneed, reading news rags, we cursed at Drudge,
Till on the haunting views we turned our backs
And towards November’s test began to trudge.
We voted asleep. Many lost their roots
But limped on, nails-gnawed. Perry lame; all blind;
Drunk with fatigue; deaf even to the hoots
Of the conservatives who dropped behind.

NEWT! Newt! Quick, boys!– An ecstasy of fumbling,
Hitting the clumsy debates just in time;
Santorum still was yelling out and stumbling
And floundering like a man in fire or slime.–
Dim, through the birth control and new spotlight
As he spoke unto me, I saw him frowning.

In all my dreams, as at a perceived slight,
Rick plunges at me, sputtering, choking, frowning.

If in some dull dreary dreams you too could trace
And chart the straw poll where he came in first,
Yet watch the numbers sitting in their place,
His changing face, as ne’er fails to show his worst;
If you could read, in every Jolt, the blood
Come gargling from the True Conserv’tive lungs,
Obscene as cancer, bitter as the cud
Of vile, inchoate views on innocent tongues,–
My friend, you would not tell with such high zest
To voters ardent for senseless ceaseless electoral vagary,
This late Lie: Dulce et decorum est
Pro Romney Suffragari.

Here’s the original poem, since it would be sweet and right to mitigate the crime I have committed by way of this blog post. [apologies to Latinists, too, my version was all wrong. Thank you @stephensheiko.]

"Don't look at me; I was a Pawlenty guy."

I suppose this is my way of telling you that I’ve resigned myself to a Romney candidacy. I was never overly opposed to Romney, but when I chose to support Rick Perry I didn’t see much point in hedging my bets.

It became evident early on that none of the other candidates had the potential to bring organization, money and conservatism to the race – Ron Paul being long on organization but short on many other things, sanity not least among them.

It was always between Rick Perry and Mitt Romney for me. I chose to dream a little. The dream choked on its vomit in South Carolina, and I’ve been left with a Mitt who day by day finds new ways to appear out of touch and politically untethered. Yet for all that, the man is a conservative when compared to Barack Obama. There is not any doubt in my mind that Romney would try very hard to undo the damage Obama has done. He’d cause all sorts of new damage (trade war with China, anyone?) but I’m convinced he’d try.

I bear him no personal animus, which, slight recommendation that may be, is by my reckoning the best he can hope for from the conservative grassroots.

Now would someone PLEASE check my Latin?

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